50 Things all Swimming Coaches Would Love

A wish list of 50 ideas which would brighten the lives of swimming coaches all over the World.

1. Fins and swim gear with kids names permanently engraved onto them
2. Self cleaning drink bottles
3. Stop watches that really are water proof
4. Lie detectors fitted into kids foreheads
5. Heart rate monitors which actually take heart rates quickly and accurately
6. An objective parent
7. The swimming official who takes young swimmers to one side and calmly and politely talks to them about why they disqualified and how they can improve next time
8. Goggles which do not come off when swimmers are tired and looking for a reason to stop
9. A swimming log book which completes itself
10. A mood detector for the coach to wear to warn swimmers in advance how he / she is feeling
11. A Dryland program which is exciting and interesting which kids love to do and makes a real difference to their swimming performances
12. Lane ropes which automatically put themselves in and out of the pool
13. Chlorine which smells like fresh flowers
14. A swimmer who says, “Excuse me coach, but I think we did only did nine two hundreds instead of the full ten in the set”.
15. A swimmer who asks for a toilet break who actually needs to go to the toilet
16. A swimming parent who says, “You’re working hard today coach. Is there anything I can do to help you?”
17. A nutritional supplement which actually delivers what it claims
18. A coach from a neighboring club ringing and asking, “One of your swimmers has asked if they could join our program. I wanted to ask you how you felt about it and if it was ok for me to talk to the swimmer about their options but I have asked the swimmer to sit and discuss the matter with you first”.
19. A local swim club administrator asking the coach, “Excuse me coach, I wanted your opinion on how we could provide really innovative, exciting, new competition programs for swimmers”.
20. Kick boards that taste like broccoli so that kids don’t chew on them
21. Pull bands that never get lost
22. Starting blocks that rise out of the end of the pool when you need them and disappear when you don’t
23. Back stroke flags that repel things thrown over them (like goggles and towels)
24. Swimmers who bring clean water bottles to training and actually drink all the fluid they contain rather than use the fluid for water fights or squirting at the girls
25. Swimmers who take less than 40 minutes to take a shower
26. Swimmers who walk in to training at 5:30 am and say, “Good morning coach. I am really excited to be here and can’t wait to start training”.
27. Swimmers who get in the water after being asked once
28. Self adjusting, unbreakable goggles that never get lost
29. Unbreakable swim caps which are self cleaning and self drying
30. Swimmers who streamline off every wall, every time and never have to be reminded to do it
31. A parent bringing their child to your program actually praising their previous coach for their outstanding work
32. White board markers which actually work when the board gets wet
33. Swim bags which empty themselves and hang themselves up to dry
34. Self drying / self cleaning swim towels
35. Swimmers who turn up early and ask, “Excuse me coach, would you mind if I did a few extra laps to work on my technique”
36. Swimmers who stay later and ask the same question
37. Swimmers who dress warmly after training – including wearing shoes, socks and a warm hat without being reminded
38. A bottomless cup of coffee which stays hot for the first hour of morning training
39. Swimmers who listen carefully when the workout is being explained and never ask “What are we doing?”
40. Coaches from neighboring programs meeting over coffee and swapping ideas to help each other develop professionally and to exchange information to help the sport improve in their local area
41. Deck shoes that keep the coach’s feet warm and dry and never gets moldy or stinky
42. A sun hat with an air conditioner built into it
43. A group of parents who come and say, “Hey coach – don’t worry that we had a bad meet, we are with you 100% and we believe in your ability to do it better next time”
44. A swim equipment manufacturer who says, “This product will only improve your swimming if you also work really hard consistently for about six months”.
45. Another coach who says at a meet, “Hey, I noticed your kids were a bit late getting here and have no lane to use for warm up. How about I move my swimmers over a little and you can share with us”.
46. A set of paddles which actually improve stroke technique and strength without changing swimming mechanics
47. A set of fins which actually improve kicking speed and leg strength without changing swimming mechanics
48. A parent who says, “I am not concerned my child did not win today. I can see the great work you are doing with their technique and skills and in the longer term that is more important than winning today”.
49. Swimmers stretching without being told to and doing all the stretches correctly.
50. A sports scientist who understands the actual needs and issues faced by an age group swimming coach and who can communicate useable information effectively at that level in language the coach can understand

Wayne Goldsmith and Helen Morris